Tuesday the 2nd, Day 42:

AUGH!!!

I've been ABDUCTED by ALIENS!

Or alien Vets...

...or just Vets...

...and maybe I wasn't ABDUCTED really, it was more like Dad handed my leash to them, and said, "I'll be back, Bertha!" all cheerfully, like I was off on a holiday.

*grumble*

They gave me a shot... one that made me groggy and sleepy and DROOLY...

THEN they probed me.

I didn't like the probing... and I liked the other things even LESS, too!!

They took lots of samples. I don't think I have any blood LEFT. *grumble grumble* I got plenty of urine left though, because my bladder has what Dad called an "infection". I have to take peanut butter bites, twice a day... I have a suspicion, because one of those peanut butter bites had a rather nasty-tasting CENTER... I think Dad is poisoning my infection, in an effort to kill it.

It gets worse, though!! They said my nasty ears had a YEAST infection!! ICKYpoo! Dad found that especially funny, for some reason... we'll see how funny he thinks it is, when he has to put that ear-cleaner in my ears three times a day! ha ha ha, Dad...

They said yeast is 'normal' in a dog, but mine got out of control- so between the thing he's hiding in peanut butter bites everyday, and the daily ear cleaning, it should clear up.

I just feel yucky- I'm all dirty now... I drooled all over myself in the vet hospital, cause of my drug-induced haze... and so now my fur looks just like my stuffed turtle toy! Or the cat toys I steal and mouth before I give them back dried all spiky-stiff... hah hah hah! I can't wait till Dad washes me a little, so I don't feel so yucky anymore... I like being CLEAN!

Right now, I just want to SLEEP. I don't think it was so very charming, staggering around drooling like a drunkard... I'm gunna pay back Dad and Pa for laughing so much... bad bad men... you wait till one of YOU is sick! hrmf. I am going to laugh, SO hard.

Big Bertha